2/22/09

Finding My Best Friend...Jesus Christ




I grew up with atypical absence seizures, the kind you get the aura...then stare out..but they never went away. I grew up taking Phenobarbital. I also grew up in a family that didn't know Jesus. I got married when I was 19-and after we got married he pressed this Jesus thing on me...and I rejected it...our marriage was always off and on...Then in my early twenties, an odd type of seizure kept trying to show up during stressful times...and I wrote it off. Mind you, it was twice as stressful, as for I still wasn't into Jesus.Then, I was blessed with my being pregnant with my daughter, Tory...in a rocky relationship-but to me was a sign that it was to stay together. Soon after, during the pregnancy my seizures got worse. And weren't getting better. My neurologist in Alabama kept increasing my dose of Phenobarbital. When I had her, the seizures didn't dissipate. And my relationship w/my husband then-was getting worse. I went back to AZ to find a neurologist who could do something for it. In time, my husband-felt he had to as well. I had my first brain surgery in 2002 at the Mayo Hospital...I wasn't into Jesus yet...it was painful...but I was seizure free. I had oddly bought a cross right before the surgery, not sure why. Then two months after my surgery, we had to move to TX where my now ex husband was stationed with the Army. Four days after getting there, first night in our apartment, he beat me. The Army pulled him out, and in time my daughter and I went back to AZ. Where I was in dire need. I was in tears..and turned to overdosing on Phenobarbital, my medicine, to numb the pain. I knew I needed something else...I somehow, unwell...found this purple sign that said Cornerstone, my church on Feb 9 2003...and since then have been there...and seeking Him that year...finding wellness...almost didn't make it once after a ridiculous OD-the elaboration on what occured still makes me cry-but also tears of joy that He LOVES ME SO MUCH...That was when I turned for good, knowing I'd never turn back. I have been on fire since. In the middle of all of it-I found the love of my life-Jesus blessed me with-Christian Siebens. So many stories-He has patience like Jesus. God bless him... he has shown me what love is-how to accept it and how to give it. Thru every aching moment of life. He is a gem, in all times thru Christ.
A lot of brain and health struggles-along with my daughter being diagnosed with epilepsy. But He has opened doors for my health since...such as a second brain surgery in 2005 that was fabulous. I have had every test you can question....and been on every drug you could have questions about...along with knowing...if you don't have faith in Him...seizures tend to climb back up. HE IS MY MEDICATION!

He has some more plans underway-3rd brain surgery is being set up. I am limited to certain meds-and some I just can't take. Just got out of the hospital-as for it looked like I had MS or cancer due to one that controls me well-so I am back to seizures until fixed. He has amazing plans-and the amazing part is-I am calm-know all HIS control-and amazed at who this all can reach. I take the weaknesses in joy-for it helps me help others find Him! AMEN!
In His Love,
Hetty Siebens
1 Corinthians 2:9 No eye has seen, no ear has heard, no mind has imagined what God has prepared for those who love Him!!

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