The Why's God...

There is so much going on in everyone's life today. We all pretty much know the times are getting nearer... no one knows the date or time. But we can sure tell by drastic signs- that He will be back for His children- sooner than later.

Do we know that date? No. So do I sit back and just decide, hey, let's spend less on my third brain surgery... in case He comes hours after. He opened that door- along with the suffering for a reason. He actually opened that door twice- but my hubby slammed it shut the first time. My second brain surgery was enough for Him. But it opened quickly again. And I am one to take it. God has amazing reasons for everything. Perhaps it will bring someone to Christ during it all. Perhaps when I am well after- I will be able to finally get out more again and live for Him EVEN MORE-for others! We never know. I just go with it- with faith. As for He has worked wonders thru everything. Some we see now-- some we will see later and be astounded!

As for dear Kate Mcrae. That has really been weighing heavy on my heart. It has always been easy for me to take the tough stuff- probably because I am so grateful He brought me to Him, saved me-- even so clueless so late in life. But He loved me so much- as He does us all. And He does little Kate and her parents Aaron (pastor at my church) and Holly (amazing mom-on fire for Christ!) And with every update during the chemo- was hard- but I know suffering is hard for us all- and He won't give us more than we can handle. Then the news hit. After such amazing news of her blood counts finally rising overnight!! WOW!! We were so excited. Led to that crucial MRI-to see what all the rough chemo did. And that tumor is still there--that was an un-operable part-still there!! After all that tough stuff on such a precious little one. And everyone's hearts dropped... felt like they stopped. Here I am... selfishly excited for my third brain surgery- for something like epilepsy... and here is precious little Kate-- who had it-- as much as they could take out-- on top of radiation and chemo-- and that left over tumor is still there. What little -- just now six year old wants this? Sees the beauty in it all? In what she is really doing for so many?? She is one amazing spark-- always has been. And when one, who is ill, isn't full of that spark like before... it rips your heart out. This I know from my husband and daughter's point of view of me. We know all things will work all for His Glory-- but this is just so tough. And between her, and Matt Chandler- Pastor of an awesome church in Dallas @mattchandler74  --also had brain surgery-frontal lobe- for tumor. And it came back malignant-- now facing radiation and chemo thru February.... this makes me wish I could take these from these two. As for it is my 3rd brain surgery anyway... been thru it....

But I have to try to remind myself-- He has a reason for THEM too.... working thru THEM... just is so hard. When one like me, it is just epilepsy-- so I am so excited for my 3rd brain surgery. And these others are tumors-- finding out they were cancerous-- moving into more trials with it. Makes me feel selfish.

So I sit here-- praying big-- for both #katemcrae @aaronmcrae and @hollymcrae 's little girl, and @mattchandler74 -pastor in Dallas... praying their cancer WILL be healed by our AMAZING HEALER--- DEAR #JESUS!! Epilepsy, and all my surgeries have been a long road--- but I just have no room to complain. As for my tears go out to them.

Blessings to you all-- know I am here if you need prayer. He DOES work wonders- this I do know! And will with these two as well!!

In His Love,

Heather Siebens  @AliveinMe  @EpilepsyCures

Psalm 34:17-18 The LORD hears His people when they call to Him for help. He rescues them from all their troubles. The LORD is close to the brokenhearted; He rescues those who are crushed in spirit.

Psalm 91:14-15 The LORD says, "I will rescue those who love me. I will protect those who trust in my name. When they call on Me, I will answer; I will be with them in trouble. I will rescue them and honor them."